


Insecure Out Loud

by Waldo



Category: NCIS: Los Angeles
Genre: Angst, Community: 50ficlets, Episode Related, Episode Tag, Episode: s01e12 Past Lives, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-23
Updated: 2010-01-23
Packaged: 2017-10-06 15:14:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Waldo/pseuds/Waldo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tag to Past Lives.  Sometimes G's insecurities slip out and and it becomes obvious that he's more comfortable in any of his made-up personas than his real one.  This makes Sam a little nuts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Insecure Out Loud

**Author's Note:**

> **Written for:** [](http://www.dreamwidth.org/userinfo?user=50ficlets)[**50ficlets**](http://www.dreamwidth.org/userinfo?user=50ficlets), Prompt: #07 - Where You Belong

On the way out of the office, Sam continued the friendly banter about Jagger versus Springsteen and at some point G started going on about AC/DC and Poison and Sam just rolled his eyes.

When they got outside, Kensi announced, "We can take my car, but someone else is driving. After multiple encounters with that demented whackjob of a lawyer, I need _several_ drinks."

Nate put his hand up and Kensi tossed him the keys. They all watched with amusement as Nate fumbled to push the seat back far enough as Hetty, who had commandeered the passenger's seat, pulled hers up, so that Eric could sit behind her.

Sam nodded G towards his car, popping the trunk and putting both their laptop bags away.

G was picking up his ramble about which karaoke songs they should and should not do as they climbed in and fastened their seatbelts. As soon as both doors were closed, Sam reached over and slapped G in the back of his head.

"Ow! The fuck?!" G turned quickly and Sam saw one hand instinctively reach for his gun. Sam put one hand out to make sure that G's reflexes didn't get ahead of his rational brain.

"You know," G growled, looking more pissed than Sam expected him to, "I had a partner who was a little too fond of doing that at one point. You'll notice I'm not working with him any more."

"I'm worried," Sam bit out sarcastically as he started the car and followed Nate out of the parking lot.

"You want to tell me what the fuck that was _for_?" G asked shifting back into his seat, finally relaxing now that the perceived threat was identified.

"'Why?'" Sam parroted back at him.

"That's what I asked. Why did you –"

"No, that was for asking 'why?' inside. We said we waited for you and you asked 'why?' Like we wouldn't wait. Like we _shouldn't_ have waited for you." Sam was glad he needed to watch the traffic, he was really getting frustrated with G's issues and the fact that as hard as he tried, he couldn't seem to get through to him.

He tried to remember that three years of solid partnership wouldn't trump almost four decades of abandonment. He tried to tell himself that it wasn't a personal insult that G assumed everyone walked away from him sooner or later, with various degrees of drama. He tried to tell himself that he could outstubborn even G Callen when he wanted to and he was damned determined to get G to trust him when he said he'd be there; that he wouldn't walk away and that here, in L.A. with this crew, he wasn't the only one who had G's back.

But some days those lofty philosophies were a lot harder to hang onto than others. And when faced with the reality of G being insecure out-loud, it was hard to even remember there were those other days.

Sam was pretty sure he'd never understand how someone could be so much more confident being someone he'd invented on the spot, than being the person he'd actually been his entire life.

"We're gonna do this now?" G asked sullenly, arms crossed across his chest.

Sam had too much experience with G to let that old ploy work any more. That particular expression was apparently one that G had learned to use to forestall any conversation he didn't want to have. "Yeah, G, we're gonna do this now. That way we don't have to do it in front of Nate and Hetty and everyone else in that damn bar tonight. You think _they_ didn't think that was a – a – " Sam couldn't figure out the word he wanted. He didn't actually want to call G 'pathetic' to his face. Not when he meant it more literally than most people used the word any more. "It's the kind of question that makes Nate start asking a lot of questions, you know?" He finally said.

Finally having had enough time to get his game face back on, G deliberately relaxed his body. "I just meant that you could have called and told me where to meet up with you all."

Sam scowled. "No you didn't." When G made a sound of protest, Sam repeated himself. "No you _didn't_, G. And we both know the answer to that anyway. If I'd called and told you where we were headed, you wouldn't have shown up."

"You know, I've gone a long time taking care of myself. I don't need a goddamn cruise director at this point." G was losing his battle with pretending he wasn't uncomfortable with this conversation. And he'd long ago accepted the fact that even if the rest of the world bought whatever face he showed them, Sam would always see him for who he really was.

Some days he really hated him for that. Or wanted to.

Sam blew out a breath and reached over to lace his fingers through G's where his hand rested on his leg. "I know. But look at it this way, some of us don't like getting dumped in with all the losers who walked out on you in the past."

G blew out a long breath. "I'm starting to get that," he conceded. To try and help make sure Sam knew he was serious, he flipped his hand over under Sam's and squeezed.

They followed the rest of the team another few blocks, letting a heavy silence fill the car. About three blocks out, Sam turned to study G in the red glow of the traffic light. "This case has really gotten into your head. I could call Kensi, tell her we're begging off… you could come home with me?"  He'd offered G the out in the office, but belatedly realized that right after he'd said they'd all waited for him, G wouldn't have bowed out.  Even if he didn't understand why they'd waited, he'd never appear ungrateful that they had.

Callen squeezed Sam's hand again. "Tell you what, let's go get Kensi drunk enough that she gets _on_ the bar to sing, and then I'll take you up on that last part."

Sam smiled and pulled his hand out from G's and slid it around his shoulders and squeezed. "Best plan I've heard all night."


End file.
